T’was the night before Christmas, and Santa Claus had issues; the Elves were revolting, the Chief Fairy had taken to the bottle, the Reindeer were livid that Rudolph had done a deal with Sky, and Mrs Claus had mistletoe and amorous intentions – she always got frisky this time of year.

But truth to tell, what was causing Santa most grief was the fact he’d only received 10 please-may-I-have letters this year, and 2 of those had been mis-delivered and turned out to be for the computer shop down the road.

‘Woe is me and thrice woe,’ moaned Santa, (bit of an old thespian!) ‘My strapline’s saggy, my website’s wobbly, and my leaflets are lacklustre. If only I knew where to turn, to get some magic and sparkle back into the business.’

Mrs Claus poured herself a glass of what was left of the mulled wine – that Chief Fairy couldn’t half knock it back –  “If I were you,” she said, “I’d call one of them copywriters you hear so much about. Apparently they’re more than happy to stick their noses into other people’s businesses. You can do it right after Boxing Day, but right now, my dear, I’ve got a little bit of mistletoe . . “’

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